The Value of Touch

How many times a day do you have physical contact with others?
This could mean a kiss from your spouse, hug from your children, or a hand shake with a colleague.

Now think of all the other times you see people, but don't have any physical contact with them.  At home, at the coffee shop, getting your lunch, walking down the sidewalk....the possibilities are endless.

Physical touch is something most of us take for granted.  We generally experience a healthy amount of positive touch that allows us the value of not knowing what life would be like without it.

As a massage therapist, I personally know the value of touch in a way most don't.

During school they put us through a class called "Special Populations."  We learn about massage for the elderly, disabled, infants and children, and pregnant women.  When they talk to you about the elderly, or geriatrics, you learn something.  Something a book can't teach you.  Something you can only know by experience.

Regardless of how you massage, sometimes it's the power of touch and touch alone that heals.

I never fully understood that until I massaged some wonderful residents at an assisted living facility.  They didn't want to be "massaged".  They wanted a hand on their back to soothe them.  They wanted to just have their hand held.  They wanted to feel another human.  Their entire lives were spent with human contact the same as us, but as they aged their lives became more secluded from physical touch. In an assisted living facility, it was one of the main things they lacked. They wanted to feel loved and important again. At first I really tried to massage them and couldn't understand why their definition of massage was different than mine.  Why did they just want to have their back rubbed like you would a child?  I really couldn't comprehend it, until a woman said "It just feels so comforting to have you hold my hand.  Can you just do that?" Just hold her hand.  It was so simple, yet so hard for me to understand why that's all she wanted.  I was fortunate enough to have loved ones that gave me warm embraces on a daily basis.  I'll never forget how grateful she was to hold my hand and tell me about her day.  It was an experience that left a big impact and that has stayed with me with every elderly client I've had the pleasure of working with.
Just knowing that you've changed someone's day and possibly even their life by a single touch is powerful.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the people in my life that I've helped with massage.  It's often the kind of job where people thank you when they leave.  You've helped relieved their pain and ease their sore muscles and they're always grateful.

Until last week, it never occurred to me that human contact could also be as valued by someone younger.  Another client explained to me how just positive touch and human contact was something they didn't know they needed, but something they've been needing for a long time.  It helped them and they were truly grateful.

We spend our lives with other people, but what happens when we starve ourselves of the physical contact we need?  We become so lonely that emotional pain can become physical pain.  We, as humans, are designed to comfort each other through physical touch.  It's in our nature.

Next time you give someone a hug or a reassuring pat on the back, think of how that will improve their day and yours.  Imagine what it would be like without it.

Touch is one of the beautiful things we take for granted daily.  It's a beautiful part of life.  Someday you may not have that, or it may not be what you used to have.

We should be grateful and never forget the power of touch.